And so it was

I simply going to head to bed after working all day and watching an alright movie(Prozac Nation) but I always have to check email, read LJ & the news. And this is was happened.

Ben,
Hey! I'm glad you wrote me. It brought/is bringing tears to my eyes. I always get emotional of letters and emails (or maybe I'm a bit to emotional since it's that time of the month but I know that isn't true.)

Arkansas has been treating me alright. I feel like I haven't done anything with my summer even though I at least working and reconnecting with old friends here. There have been countless of times that I have wished that I could just go pop up in Pittsburgh. I miss so many different elements of Pittsburgh( i.e. people).

It seems that death has touched many of my friends life this summer. I'm sorry to hear about your friend Dina but I have no real words to offer that wouldn't be cliche. Why is it that we rarely see things changing? Most of the time is seems we wake up one day and realize that so many things around us are different.

Steve, you, & I have to have unconditional love or all those hours in 'The Lounge' were a waste. And I know that is true in the slightest. I have this friend Josh here that kinda reminds me of you in many ways. But Josh and I have these epic talks in his car that go on until the wee hours of the morning. I think I could catalog my high school life through those talks in his car and 'The Lounge' is kinda like that for our freshman year. (I not sure if you got anything out of that because it was kinda random and off topic to.)

I hope that you pull the grade you need for Algebra class. At least this time you can honestly say that you tried and for me as long as I know that I actually tired at something it makes the outcome a little easier. Maybe you need to take a year off of college or maybe it just isn't your cup of tea. Just make sure that think about whatever you decide to do.

I never did like Louis so I probably won't that surprised that he can be bitchy. I shall await the details though. I have this feeling that whenever I do get to Pittsburgh that I'm not going to get to sleep for the first week though. I have so much talking to do with you, Steve, Colin, Sydney, & countless other people. I get excited just thinking about it and then anxious and sad also.

I can't wait for school to start but then I start to worry about money again. I could wish that I wasn't so dependent upon but that is so foolish. I've spend a lot of this summer feeling guilty about going to a school that is out of state and so expensive. I feel that sometimes I'm way to selfish about the things I want out of life and that it costs others to much(mainly my mother.) I at least feel good about the fact that I'm working. Most of the summer I've been working at McDonald's and believe me it bites but it can be interesting at times. I just recently got a second job at Hastings which is this local cd, book, movie store. I worked both for the first time today and the rest of my summer shall be spent working 2 jobs. I just hope I don't get burned out before I even get to Pittsburgh.

I'm not even sure what day I shall be returning. But I know its going to be awesome. Because Sarah Egan(I do believe you guys met at karaoke) is going to drive down and get me. I know that the trip shall be interesting because how could it not with Egan there. I just been trying to iron out the details of it all. So that everything will come together.

Its so interesting that you wrote me today. I was at home changing to go to the other job and out of nowhere the song Hey Ya comes on & I launch into telling my mom about the Valentine's Day cruise. Its funny because she remembers Steve by the cocoa incident and I think she'll remember you by Hey Ya & the cruise story.

I'm going to have to hit the sack because I have another 10 hour work day a head of me.


Love you,
Selena